Developing Self-Compassion: How to Show Yourself Some Love

Self-compassion leads to contentment and offers a kind of immunity against negative influences like fear, according to researcher Kristin Neff, associate professor of educational psychology at the University of Texas at Austin.

More than self-esteem, self-compassion can soothe you when you're upset, help you gain perspective, and allow you to accept your faults. With that mindset, you can flourish.

Neff has identified three important elements of self-compassion:

  • Self-kindness: This simply means being understanding with yourself, rather than judgmental.
  • Feeling connected with others in life: This is what Neff calls "common humanity."
  • Mindfulness: This is often described as viewing a situation in real time without coloring it with "what ifs?"

Self-compassion doesn't depend on your reaching ideal and possibly unrealistic goals, but from caring for yourself as you are, with your own balance of weak and strong points.

People with self-compassion experience less anxiety and are more comfortable in their own skin.

What's more, if you're a mom or dad, having self-compassion can help you feel more at ease with your parenting skills, which will benefit your kids. Other research shows that children of parents who are less judgmental about their parenting abilities report fewer symptoms of depression and anxiety.

More information

Read more from Kristin Neff about the importance of self-compassion.


3 Ways to, develop, true, compassion - wikiHow

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Forgive Yourself, when you make a mistake, do you dwell on it for a long time? Purposely look for things that happen in your life to be grateful for. I wont be motivated if I dont criticize myself. Typical reaction: "Why did I DO that?". 4, while you should definitely learn from your mistakes, you shouldnt beat yourself. We use cookies to make wikiHow great.